Craft Gone Bad: Boob Scarves, Cat Ties & The Wrong Side of Cozy
Marian Lizzi is 41 years old and lives in Manhattan. By day she is Editor-in-Chief of the Perigee Books imprint at Penguin. By night she does "a bit of standup comedy" and explores the wide wrong world of bad craft on her blog Kraftomatic.
Boob Scarf anyone?
What's the single most horrific craft project you've ever seen?
The potato costume has eyes!
It might have to be a tie between soaps shaped like buffalo wings and
crocheted spotted dick (British dessert pudding). Both are
Are there certain genres of crafts that tend to engender more bad craft than others?
There do seem to be some trends. I've noticed a lot of soaps in strange shapes (in addition to the buffalo wings, I've found hot dogs, creme brulee, dentures, remote controls, etc).
The Japanese art of
amigurumi (miniature crocheted or knitted figures with human faces)
yields a lot of questionable projects -- things that are supposed to
look cute but end up seeming random and strange (such as smiling tea
Daniel Craig frozen treats...stone cold Bond.
I've also discovered some trends that are evidently quite popular, though I'd never heard of them before -- such as fabric postcards and frighteningly lifelike baby dolls for grown-ups that are referred to as "reborns."
Oh sweet Jesus.
One last trend: strange wedding-cake toppers. I had no idea that couples were commissioning their likenesses as reindeer, zombies, sock monkeys, gunslingers, hedgehogs, or rabid sports-team enthusiasts. Now I know.
"I'm sorry if this is your father."
Let's talk about cozies for a minute. Are there things that should just
NOT be given a cozy?
I've been surprised and amused at the inventiveness of cozy
enthusiasts out there. I figured I'd find lots of cellphone and iPod
cozies (and I have), but I never imagined things like lip-balm cozies,
asthma-inhaler cozies, ice-cream-carton cozies, or apple sweaters.
Seriously, people are knitting and crocheting (and buying) cozies for
their fruit. I can't get over it. Last night I posted a bong cozy,
which the crafter will customize for your...water pipe.
Do you craft?
Coffee cup cozy overkill
I like to buy old necklaces at thrift stores, take them apart, and
restring them in new ways. I don't sell them -- they're just for me to
make and wear.
Ghost cellphone finger puppets made of felt.