Will the Hilarious Lame Rap Video Ever Die? (Sorry, Whole Foods Parking Lot)


Will the hilarious lame rap video ever die?

No offense to the L.A. guys who did the amusing "Whole Foods Parking Lot", or to the legendary Weird Al Yankovic, who has a new album out.

But it's becoming clear that there's a formula to stuff like this. Would-be viral video stars are catching on to the comedy of incongruity, and figuring out how to mix high brow and low brow, lower class and upper class, neurotic ultra-specificity and inane machismo. Execution matters, of course, but these videos are beginning to feel like different executions of the same recipe.

If you've got a good lyricist, the formula just works. In my college musical comedy group, a guy wrote a rap called "Gangsta Registrar," in which the college registrar raps about the minutiae and the bureaucracy of signing up for classes. It became legendary. The next year we had a rap about Beowulf. Also hilarious.

The genre has a history: Weird Al was a pioneer, and we had an old lady rapping in The Wedding Singer. Later, those Lonely Island guys on SNL came in with "Lazy Sunday," about cupcakes and Chronicles of Narnia, through "I Just Had Sex" this year. Flight of the Conchords sometimes uses a similar shtick. There are dozens more.

But "Whole Foods Parking Lot" causes one to wonder if and when the genre will run its course. Every aspiring Andy Samberg who's a decent lyricist can just break out the list of Stuff White People Like, close their eyes, point to something and go nuts. Just start off slow and introduce us to the concept. Then later in the song you can raise your game by making sure to rhyme with an ultraspecific, hard-to-rhyme word that's at the end of the second half of a couplet.

Think of all the lame raps we can look forward to. "At the Genius Bar." "I'm Putting My Ikea Dresser Together." "My DVR is 99 Percent Full." "Ted Conference Parking Lot."

What else is considered lame? Books? How about a Jonathan Franzen rap? You'd set the publishing world on fire. Theater is probably off-limits for now after Neil Patrick Harris's rap at the end of the Tonys. What was especially great, and a testament to theater's declining level of stuffiness, is that it read less as incongruous and more as celebratory.

How about hyper-local L.A. rap, which is bound to get people in town extra-excited? You still have to hit the right note. What saves "Whole Foods Parking Lot" is the "parking lot" -- if it were just Whole Foods it would have been a snooze. For instance, how about the Getty? A little too easy. The Getty Villa -- much funnier. The Norton Simon? Just right. Hilarious. Art world notoriety.

You try it. Send your favorite lame rap ideas to arts@laweekly.com or @LAWeeklyArts. If you really want to impress us, toss in some rhymes. Maybe we'll all write one together.


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Guest
Guest

You listing off your daily routine in a rhyming format isn't what's bothersome about the video, it's the rampant whiggery that's the problem.  You THINK it's comedy to emulate the lingo and gestures of what's considered "street" within your safe (read white) neighborhood, but you and the other enlightened white folks want to usurp them for your own amusement without having any experience or context to WHY you think donning a skully and jumpsuit and talking about capping fools is funny.   Otherwise, plain and simply, we just don't find you very funny or talented.

David Wittman
David Wittman

I do wear those clothes in my real life, and nobody's "capping" anybody, and nobody here thinks that's funny.  I just don't think you get it, and that's okay.  Did you grow up listening to hip hop?  I'm wagering no.  And anybody who knows anything about it would know I'm not styling myself as some kind of real rapper.  Also not borrowing equity from another culture... just responding to my own inspirations and influences.  I'd write more and get into it a bit... but it's obvious that like 3 people read this blog.  Small potatoes.  I have a request in to the writer to see some of his early comedy music troupe stuff... but still no response.  Critics... what can you do.  In the mean time... I wish you guys the best and hope you find the kind of passion and connection to which you allude in your comments.  Sigh.

David Wittman
David Wittman

Your article is pretty well written... but if you blur your eyes just right and step back a little from the computer screen... the word "HATER" comes into clear focus.  Why did you bother typing this out?  If my video had less hits, you'd be whining about something else.  Sounds like you need to go do something creative, or at least enjoy something creative.  Whatever floats your boat.  Godspeed.

Desicus Parnable McNasty
Desicus Parnable McNasty

Hahaha how's Googling yourself working out for you?

Anyway, since you're reading this,  I agree with the author. Your video is lame. The rapping is bad and the jokes aren't funny and the concept has been stale since the Reagan Administration.

But yeah, keep doing creative things, dude. Like posting comments on articles about you.

David Wittman
David Wittman

Well, for one... I don't count writing this response as a "creative thing"...  this is just like, I dunno... I guess the new way we communicate with other humans... which is truly lame.  I'm stuck in an airport right now, so you know... something to do.  I'll admit to paying attention to the responses and comments about this video maybe a little more than I should...  There have been a lot of them!!  And your advice is well taken, maybe I'll go read some news or something.  Good call.  Sorry u don't dig the video!!!  I have this glitch where I literally want everybody to like me... which is obviously not going to happen.  :)

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