Oscar Losers Can Still Walk Away With The Goods
Actors, directors, producers, don't despair: If you leave the Kodak Theater Sunday without a little golden man in your hand (no, not you, Paul Reubens), you can still exit with quite the booty (you neither, K-Kard). 
This particular award is a rather lavish gift basket that goes only to the losers among this year's Oscar Awards nominees. Distinctive Assets claims this year's version of its annual losers' basket contains $85,000 worth of goodies (and who would disagree, except maybe for the stars' tax preparers).
The grab bag contains: Paperwork for a $45,000 stay at an African Safari Lodge, including four nights at the Lion Sands Private Game Reserve in South Africa for as many as eight adults and eight children, with private-chef-prepared meals included; a certificate for a $14,500 four-night stay at the Monte Carlo Beach Hotel in Monaco; a Tiffany crystal-studded cat collar; a $4,000 limited edition leather travel bag from Victorinox; a certificate for a private-island vacation at the Turks & Caicos Sporting Club; a coupon for a professional studio photography package for a dog; and a voucher for a one-week fitness bootcamp experience.
But wait, there's more. The rundown of goods is touted as a "a sneak peak of what Sandra Bullock, James Cameron, Woody Harrelson, Matt Damon, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jeff Bridges, Helen Mirren, Meryl Streep, Penelope Cruz and Mo'Nique will receive if they leave the Academy Awards empty handed on Sunday night." Just them? Is this a prediction?
The gift bag's giver stresses that it is not an official part of the Academy Awards, but we're sure there will be official takers. Losing pays.
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