Bedbugs Finally Outnumber Hipsters In New York City, Shoot For Total (High-Brow) Infestation At Carnegie Hall
In the month since we last reported on New York City's booming bedbug epidemic, the situation's gotten worse than we ever could have hoped.
You can run, but you can't hide
It was embarrassing enough when the nasty little vamps invaded fashion palaces like Niketown and Elle Magazine. (Turns out Victoria's Secret and Hollister were also targets.) But this is so much worse:
New York City's top two Meccas of musical enlightenment -- the Lincoln Center and Carnegie Hall -- have just tested positive for the bug.
Last week, theater officials at the Lincoln Center found an infestation in a ballet dressing room: According to the New York Post, they had to use "bedbug-sniffing dogs to uncover the pests, then called in exterminators."
Now, the Gothamist files a tip that the terrorists have made their way to the one-and-only Carnegie Hall:
"The bugs are located in the Stern auditorium, also, employee lockers," says our source. "The employees were told not to use their lockers for a month. They are trying to hush it up so they don't lose money. Employees won't talk for fear of losing their jobs."
Just look at 'em go!
Update: As if things could get any worse, THIS JUST IN from the United Nations press office:
"Over the weekend, dogs detected bedbugs in [U.N.] conference room chairs. Infected chairs have now been replaced."
Goodnight, New York City. Don't let the... OK, we'll stop gloating now.