Ravers Rejoice: Ecstasy Doesn't Make You Stupid, as Previously Assumed

Categories: Raves

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Ravers are now smart.
Good news, ravers: Ecstasy doesn't make dumb. The milieu of the "e-tard" is just a stereotype. Sort of.

That according to a new, $1.8 million study released Tuesday and funded by the National Institute on Drug Abuse. " ... We found no ominous, concerning risks to cognitive performance," says lead author John Halpern.

This is huge for L.A., the American capital of raves. Any bad news in this? Yes, there is:

In order to conclude that ecstasy doesn't make you dumb, researchers had to weed ravers out of their subject group. Our conclusion: Ravers are dumb without ecstasy!

We kid.

But seriously, researchers did take the ravers out of the equation: Members of this particular genus of party-goer are "repeatedly exposed to sleep and fluid deprivation from all-night dancing -- factors that themselves can produce long-lasting cognitive effects," according to a summary of the research.

Also, people who used other drugs, people who might have been a little slow in the first place, and drug screening the day of the experiment were used to start with a clean slate.

John Halpern:

"Researchers have known for a long time that earlier studies of ecstasy use had problems that later studies should try to correct. When NIDA decided to fund this project, we saw an opportunity to design a better experiment and advance our knowledge of this drug."

Still, ecstasy isn't exactly beer.

Halpern:

"Ecstasy consumption is dangerous: illegally-made pills can contain harmful contaminants, there are no warning labels, there is no medical supervision, and in rare cases people are physically harmed and even die from overdosing.

We're feeling smarter already.

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8 comments
Max
Max

LOL at @5900bc43bf77a4511ad2863a9ae55801:disqus and @673130f5fa765e9e5d50a861c5c0fe9d:disqus . You poor ravers are insulted by his demeanor in this BLOG post. Yellow journalism? This is a blog post. Look at your address bar: http://blogs.laweekly.com If you knew what a newspaper was, you'd look it up in the "Opinion" section.

Regardless, he was saying he wasn't serious. Leave it to a dumbass to fail in reading comprehension.

Mr. Romero, witty article. Informative and true. Ravers are stereotypically stupid because anyone in their right mind wouldn't be able to understand why they would buy into the image of bell-bottom jeans, innumerable amounts of plastic, wildly colored jewelry, and pacifiers so they don't bite their tongues off. 

Let the "hater" comments begin :)

RollFace
RollFace

once i was rolling soo hard i had to pull my face out of my head... :-Di knew i wasn't getting stooopid.

Romerocantdj
Romerocantdj

Oh Romero. Your sarcasm is just so riveting. Honestly...get a life dude. We ALL get it, you hate Insomniac, you hate raves, you hate real journalism. We GET IT ALREADY!!

*Yellow journalism or the yellow press is a type of journalism that presents little or no legitimate well-researched news and instead uses eye-catching headlines to sell more newspapers. Techniques may include exaggerations of news events, scandal-mongering, or sensationalism.*

Zbeast
Zbeast

I would rather do e than drink beer at any party.. It's just a lot of fun and does not make my breath stink.

Fuckyou
Fuckyou

You're trippin man.Cotton mouth during the roll sucks.

Big Mike
Big Mike

yeah but it gives you some narly cotton mouth in the morning!

MichaelM
MichaelM

These kids need to know how to handle ecstasy. Not only that, but they should invest in testing kits so they know what they're consuming.

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