Alyssa Bereznak, Gizmodo Intern, Disses Magic: The Gathering, Feels Wrath of a Million Nerds

Remember, unattractive women are reporters for newspapers, blogs and radio.  HOT ones get to go on TV.  No surprise there.

Lets look at Alyssa Bereznak.  She's an unattractive, overweight horseface.  Methinks it is she who should've warned others about how physically repellent she is.  Coupled with her unintelligent, lame snarky attitude it's no wonder that she'll only be able to score with deaf guys at least 20 years her senior.  Oh, and she's a lousy writer. I'm not a nerd, like Jon Finkel, but having degrees in Engineering and Physics and being wealthy due to licensing my IP do make it easy to sniff out losers like her. She's a tool.

I just read Alyssa Bereznak's article on how Objectivism tore her family apart. I found it heart-breaking that her father was such a selfish prick. Ms. Bereznak is going to have a hard time relating to men for much of her life, if not all of it, if she doesn't get some counseling.The relationship between fathers and children is not appreciated in much of our culture, and when fathers fail to love their children properly it affects them for the rest of their lives.As someone who played MTG for 3-4 years and who bought the Finkel V.Garfield set, I was irritated by Alyssa. But, after reading the article and reflecting on her past, I just feel sorry for her. Maybe I'm getting soft in my dotage.

We hate her because she is SHALLOW AS FUCK. get a new friend.

I'd cop it from her if she was hot, but man... what a dog o be so stuck up.

This is a funny invitation to Alyssa to learn how to play Magic.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

This article may actually be the dumbest thing I've ever read.

Doesn't matter if she was trolling or not.  She may get temporary internet fame.  She will have *permanent* dating and relationship misery.  Any future romeo googling her will know she considers any perceived flaw fair game for internet posting, and will avoid her like the plague. 

So she gets 600,000 hits on a webpage for one brief moment in 2011...and a lifetime alone, with her cats.She loses.  

To summarize what happened once again, in graphic form:

http://i1196.photobucket.com/a... once, the nerd wins in the end.  Nothing Simone says can change that.

This article actually gives Gawker and Fox News a run for their money in the crap journalism department. Congrats, I guess.

Yawn. Thought Alyssa's article was shoddy enough, now we get to read an article attacking Internet users, written by someone who doesn't understand the online community, published online. I don't know anything about Magic, but I still view her article as what people refer to as a 'troll' attempt. Thus, that makes this article even more 'trollish', so do us a favor and don't ride someone else's wave of publicity; create your own. Oh, and calling out an entire city is not very classy either.

Nice Simone!

What's it like to be a complete retard?

Jon Finkel made over 300k playing Magic: The Gathering and then turned his card playing skills into several more large chunks of cash by playing Poker in Vegas on the pro circuit. He made enough money to start a successful hedge-fund and is basically a very successful and interesting self-starter. He's got tons of money, an interesting life story, and on top of that he's the fucking world champion of something. Looks like the only thing you're the world champion of is trying to nail some dumb broad who once worked in the same building as you.

I see what you're doing though, taking a page from Alyssa. Trying to make all the nerds come give your shitty article hits.

Is this what they teach you lazy journalism majors these days? Do you all aspire to nothing more than being top dog on a gossip blog? I figured you all dreamed of being Walter Cronkites  or Woodward and Bernsteins, apparently you just want to be petty 16 year old girls. It really is sad. Some people actually go to college to learn a real skill, like how to synthesize compounds in a laboratory or how to remove someone's lung without killing them. You apparently went to college to learn how to get attention on the internet and generally be a pain in the ass.

Good luck with your "Career." This speaks volumes about the sorry state of contemporary journalism and the apparent lack of talent circulating around the UC San Diego Guardian. 

Dime a dozen girl writing stupid shit!! She has not set herself apart from the normal horrible shallow livestyle most immature women live,she's jumped in cannonball style! If you wanna know how not to act in society, read her pieces. worthless trash!!

http://www.thenerdybird.com/20...

OH LAWD. You're both dumb, awful, stereotypical pieces of shit and I'm glad you don't like "nerds"/"dorks"/whatever you think is degrading enough to call them--you don't fucking deserve them. Or anyone, for that matter.

And DON'T BRING FEMINISM INTO THIS, you HORRIBLE ASS. Goddamnit, women like you set the rest of us back decades every time you open your stupid fucking mouths.

I like how people who aren't "nerdy" or "dorky" get on the internet (a supposed BEE'S NEST of "nerds" and "dorks") and rant about things that just prove to piss off the rest of humanity...like it completes them or something.

Welcome to the internet...where we nerds, geeks, dorks and other "outcasts" gather together in HOARDS and prove, once more, that it is those that look down on us like we're a social disease that are the true monsters of our society.

Think about this for a moment, children...if nerds, geeks and their ilk are more common in today's society...then are they truly a "minority"?

Comments like the ones made by Alyssa Bereznak are just another form of racism.

Oh, and bragging about this little bombshell as "a way to get a lot of page-views" is like bragging about getting on TV because you got arrested. It's stooping to level of journalism that gives proper journalists a bad name.

Nice Simone--use that fancy journalism degree to eloquently show that you are just about as vapid as Alyssa. I'll bet you two are fun at parties (eyes rolling). 

I'm not really offended by anything Alyssa wrote.  I grew up listening to the Dead Kennedys and the Sex Pistols, and I think we need MORE mocking of laughable people, not less.  Seriously, this guy is a hedge fund manager.  By definition, he has hurt more people than we or he truly now.  Parasites like that are what collapsed the world economy. 

However, neither Alyssa or Simone strike me as anything but Born Well Off - the kind of people who had special connections to get them into the right schools, and affluent parents who made sure they never had to know the real world.  Alyssa was raised to believe Ayn Rand was the wisest economist of the last 2000 years, so it's assured she was born and raised by a Rich Asshole.  I will give Alyssa credit for turning on her father and family for the Rand obsession.  I bet her dad is gonna vote for Bachmann or Perry in the primary.

Regardless, Alyssa and Simone's only crime is the constant use of unspecific pronouns.  Seriously, gals... you're getting published and you're still having issues with it?

I am a 26 yearl old finance manager, played football in high school, have had successful relationships with attractive women, and I started playing mtg about 2-3 years ago off and on. I started while working as a counselor at a group home, couple of the boys played the game and the challenge of it is something that I enjoy. I am not ashamed that I play, in fact, its hilarious to see and hear the ignorant comments my "cool" friends make about the game. Point being that its insane to judge someone based on their interests.

On a more important side not..... where are all of these self proclaimed "nerdy" women? I have always wanted a girl friend that would play some occasional COD or take a road trip to SF worlds 2011.... just saying :)

Simone -

Have you heard of impartial journalism? As opposed to defending a friend who made a bad professional mistake? Do you understand the divide between professionalism and relationships? And here you are, making excuses for YOUR poor journalistic fact gathering , justifying your incorrect factual statement "Someone apparently hacked Alyssa's Twitter and changed.." by saying that "Not that it'll quiet the Finkel crusaders from announcing it as a victory. Stupid." No, I don't think they are the stupid ones. And you miss the point that they aren't defending Finkel, as opposed to reacting to an individual who chose to cross personal with professional boundaries and attempts to diss someone online as part of a semi-pro article. But what else can we expect from a generation weaned on "Reality" TV?

Most likely from your Twitter Photo:

Simone B. WilsonPhone: (213) 248-8062Address: 5209 Southridge AveLocation: Los Angeles, CA 90043

Birthday: December 1951 Language: unknown Hobbies: Sports, Travel, Music, Reading, Arts & crafts... Registered Voter: No Home Owner: Yes Neighborhood: Affluent

Property Details

Length of Residence: 22 yearsLot Size: 6,000 sq ftHome Size: 1,975 sq ftRooms: 9Bedrooms: 3Bathrooms: 3Floors: 1Garage: 1 Car GarageEst. Home Value: $534k

Number of People: 4 - 7 (1 - 4 Adults)Children: 3: 7 - 9 year old, 10 - 12 year old boyHeating: YesCooling: NoFireplace: Yes

The Wilson Family

The Wilson family has lived in Los Angeles, California on 5209 Southridge Ave for 22 years. There are 2 parents and 2 children in the family.

Shouldn't you edit the entire section about Forbes writer, Paul Tassi, and his relevant observations, or at the very least a footnote?

So Simone, is it 5 Haworth Avenue, Oak Tree Drive, W. Slauson Avenue, or Southridge?

Better post all the possible addresses and phone numbers just incase.

Depending your twit of a friends actions to get publicity to your sad articles (I think my friend's dog has more Twitter followers than you) has worked, expect publicity in the form of the internet. This is just the beginning.

We're coming <3.

You write like a pretty caustic cunt.

Just a heads up. Don't write and talk shit about what you don't know, or maybe the intertubes will run a train on you bitch :)

It's great that you're using a public podium like the LA Weekly to defend your friend who wrote such a cruel and shallow piece...oh wait, that's actually a pretty unprofessional thing to do! Did you two learn to behave like that when you were Editor in Chief and Managing Editor at the UCSD Guardian together?

And before you accuse me of being a nerd on a witch hunt: 1. yes, I am a nerd although I don't care about Magic the Gathering 2. I am a feminist who is annoyed by the misogynistic comments directed at Alyssa (come on, there's plenty to criticize her about without being sexist or offensive). That doesn't excuse her actions or your defense of them.

5 internet dollars says they both came up with this idea to generate more publicity for each of them.

"@simone_electra amusing: hey @alyssabereznak, all is not lost: an @laweekly commenter would "gladly fuck the shit out of" you. as would i. <3"

pics?

So, what you're basically saying that being a flame-baiting troll in order to get page views is the way to establish credibility as a professional writer?

Excuse me, but I've got to go find some wholesale segment of the population to offend for fun and profit.

The girl in question is not attractive. The funny thing in this whole story is that she implies in her article that she is a catch. She is in fact EXACTLY who you would expect to find on a dating website: not ugly but not attractive and someone who struggles to get dates through normal channels.Can't wait for the thirty year old version to write stories about "where are all the good guys?!". She should save herself the next decade of struggle and get herself a gay best friend and a quirky cat.

Stupid article, we hate her for being a media whore. It's got nothing to do with Magic the Gathering really or the internet nerds being "hurt". It's not so much about the fact that she was enough of a bitch to turn a guy down who is well within her league because of a stupid arbitrary hobby.

It's the fact that she made an article about it that publicly slandered him, without his consent. The fact that she tried to pass it off as tech journalism is a joke too.

Forbes are fucking morons too, because after all this they are going to LOSE gizmodo readers. Like the way I'm never going to come back to this site because of this horrible article.

So yeh, you played a big joke on the nerds, whatever you want to believe fuckheads.

http://i52.tinypic.com/2zewk8n...

stfu simone

I've said it already elsewhere, I'll repeat it here: noone finds it strangely convenient that all this MTG-related mess came out just 2 weeks before the release of the update to the MTG - Duels of the Planeswalkers PC/console game?

If I was in the marketing department for that game, I'd be jumping in joy now: a single post that acted as a call for countless nerds in defense of MTG, among which many probably didn't even know or played MTG before, and guess what? the game is aimed just at MTG neophytes.

Maybe I read too much into things.

Your friend has the right to post whatever nasty shit about her dates she wants, can even out them and link to their FB pages, etc... But by the same token she herself can be used in a similar fashion - trash her looks, interests, etc.  NYC is full of talented writers, filmmakers, comedians, etc.  Some of her future courters might be looking for similar fuel for material.

Heck, check out her quickmeme page - http://www.quickmeme.com/ALYSS... - Some of the things people are posting about her are mean, most specifically name her, but even the cruelest ones are clearly intended to be funny (my favorite is "Alyssa Bereznak has often been told that her vagina looks just like the lips and gums of a toothless 95-year-old man" - I've been laughing all morning about that one!).  Yeah, a lot of them are mean and shallow, most about how hard on the eyes your friend is, and the fact she clearly has either a lazy eye, or some kind of post-stroke drooping left side of her face. (and don't complain, Simone... they're using the same picture you are)

Here's some more memes that I'm sure you have no issues with, since you seem to see no limits on naming and mocking people: "Alyssa Bereznak wants to have kids soon, but none of her siblings are ready to settle down"

"Alyssa Bereznak plans to write her Graduate Thesis on her belief that Martin Luther King faked his death"

"Alyssa Bereznak is most famous for calling President Obama a "spear-chucker" during a call to the Glenn Beck Radio Show"

"Alyssa Bereznak - One time, a frozen hot-dog broke off in her asshole, and a TLC documentary crew filmed the hospital staff struggling to get it out."

"Alyssa Bereznak - Call her edgy, but she still believes the murder of Emmett Till was an AMAZING DAY!"

"Polish People: We're only known for 2 things - Killing Jews and Being Stupid!"

I got more laughs with some of the above than anything in your friend's article.  Seriously, check 'em out!  There are hundreds of them!  http://www.quickmeme.com/ALYSS...

PS - And while I do not find your friend easy on the eyes, I find you to be much more fetching, Simone.  If you're ever in NYC, hit me up.  You will not regret it.

If the guy were a WoW player, or whatever, it wouldn't have change the fact that she is a total Carrie-Bradshaw-wanna-be bitch. What she did is not cool.

Lol what he probably failed to tell her on the date was that not only did he play Magic, but he won 3.5 Million dollars at the World Series of Poker, so not only did she dump a nerd, but a rich one..GOOD JOB! Jon, looks like you dodged a bullet, buddy!

Lawl did any of you read this post at all?  Clearly a great way to get herself some views too.  Did she kill your dog?  No?  Then who cares, these ladies have an opinion, sure you may not agree with it, but get over it and let these ladies go back to their relative anonymity and private bits of personal fame.  Tons of folks are wasting tons of time when the could be doing something a lot more fun, like maybe playing magic.  As for me after getting trolled out here by some of my mtg friends I'm going to go play some Deus Ex Human Revolution :-) 

Don't think Magic-players care a lot. Nor poker players or hedge fund managers -- from my understanding, her date was all three. I think what got people riled up is the classless act of outing another human and publishing his name for laughs on your Internet blog.

Ahhh... a little internet research reveals why Simone is so quick to defend her friend. It seems Simone herself is pretty famous and reviled for her own brand of shitty reporting...

 http://www.mediabistro.com/fis...

http://www.pbs.org/idealab/201...