Matt Weaver, Cal State Campus Editor Accused of Making Light of Rape, Arrested

Steve York

Well, I'm glad LA Weekly is again covering "The Current Adventures of THE KOALA" in its pages. I can feel comfortable to post the REAL story here on Kit-Bacon Gressitt, the Jon Cryer-like troll, who runs calloutthekoala without her flagging this post for review to reveal her TURE past:

Following THE KOALA is much like the James Bond series. You know Bond "embodies the white, male heterosexual [with the] privilege-to-behave-badly," but the villain *always* makes the film. Both James Bond and THE KOALA share the same villain types: Mad Scientists, Religious Extremist Terrorists, Deadly Buxom Beauties and The Politician who is a master of media manipulation. An internet rumour that the current KOALA villain is a Former Health Executive used to death threats and has no problem with the deaths of innocent children might get you excited for an EPIC showdown. But, sorry, this instalment features some boring, old lesbian. Any follower of THE KOALA franchise must feel really let down to be stuck with THIS villain. If you were expecting another GOLDFINER get ready for BOREFINGER. [Alternate title: THE LIVING GAYLIGHTS]

Kit-Bacon Gressitt is a current student at Cal State San Marcos in the Women's Studies program. Unnecessary hyphenated first name? Good start for a villain. Hearing the buzz-word COLLEGE have you excited? Perhaps a stunning 19 year old capable of crushing your lungs with her thighs mid-coitus? Boner-killer time...Kit-Bacon is a kind of a dumpy looking 55 year old who more resembles M than Pussy Galore. Well, comparing her to Judi Dench would be an insult! She more resembles Gollum from the last Lord of the Rings, not only in her physical looks but penchant for manipulation. While she may not be from Middle Earth, she hails from a land just as barren: Fallbrook, California. While she's busy going on and on about THE KOALA, *actual* viscous rapes and murders are happening in her home town or tracked back to just blocks from the cave she calls home. But no mention of those (let alone countless serious crimes) in her ranting pages AND pages of writings and posts OR on her multiple dedicated websites. She only holds an affinity and interest in rape when it's some printed article in THE KOALA, not when it happens just feet from where she gathers for warmth. She has conveniently ignored this story for months now:http://carlsbad.patch.com/arti...

KONY could move into the cave next door to her and she would still be more concerned about some newspaper.

[Message to Kit-Bacon: Please keep your fellow Fallbrookians EAST of I-15. -Thanks, the rest of San Diego]

Like any good Bond villain, Kit-Bacon has worked her way up the corporate ladder. Before whichever mid-life crisis convinced her to become a college student, she was a columnist at The North County Times where she "won awards, a Pulitzer Prize nomination, a fan club and death threats from angry readers. " Which is rather interesting considering the Pulitzer website says: “Since 1980, when we began to announce nominated finalists, we have used the term "nominee" for entrants who became finalists. We discourage someone saying he or she was "nominated" for a Pulitzer simply because an entry was sent to us.”

For someone who hates Bill O'Reilly (who coincidentally has had THE KOALA on his show to get their side, and happily paid for beer and limo service), Kit-Bacon seems to embellish her record just as much as him.

Following the first of her documented falling outs, she oozed her way through numerous jobs and positions, never keeping them for too long. What would you trust? The judgement of her numerous bosses or her blog? She landed at FFF Enterprises (a vaccine company, which she rarely mentions considering the grass roots backlash to vaccines shared by her target audience) as Vice President of Marketing. Much like Don Draper, but imagine the world of shit she would start if she was compared to A MAN with the word “Raper” in his name?

At FFF she made enough money to give thousands AND THOUSANDS of dollars to political candidates. Perhaps most classic is her July 27, 2006 contribution of $1000 (the limit) to then Virginia Senate candidate James Webb. Webb was perhaps most well known at the point in the election cycle as the author of the *epic* "Women Can't Fight" while a Naval Academy instructor:

http://www.washingtonian.com/a... [Just about any sentence picked at random would be funny enough to contrast with Kit-Bacon's self-described “feminist views”]

You must wonder if Kit-Bacon was really a feminist why she would support Jim Webb, let alone make the MAXIMUM contribution to a candidate 3,000 miles away before researching his record. Perhaps she made the contribution on behalf of one of her rich vaccine-peddlers at FFF Enterprises? Hmmm...something smells like violation of FEDERAL ELECTION LAW.

Up to now, the story of Kit-Bacon is simply wasting money and lying about her record. Now the saga finally gets to where THE KOALA can respect her: her master political engineering and disregard for human life. While still employed at FFF Enterprises (think the thousands of dollars in campaign contributions helped?) she landed an appointed seat as a director of the Fallbrook Healthcare District following the death of Dwight Thompson. Coincidentally there is a distinct pattern of death surrounding Kit-Bacon and suggestions to exhume and investigate his death have fallen of deaf ears. Could Dwight Thompson have been knocked into a volcano? Or strangled with small hands while his entire body was ransacked of places where a “Ring to Rule Them All” may have been hidden? Kit-Bacon would surely face arrest for Gollum-related crimes against humanity IMMEDIATELY.

Kit-Bacon would soon be forced to confront her worst nightmare: a public election where her pocket book could not buy influence...or at least enough of it. With George W. Bush up for re-election, she became confidant enough to donate $2,000 (once again, the maximum) to John Kerry on July 27, 2004. Riding high on something (fumes of money and non-FDA approved vaccines perhaps?) Kit-Bacon would face her own October Surprise Swift Boat: some 23 month old child just *had* to die on the Emergency Room waiting room floor of her hospital in March and now that “pesky liberal media” was asking questions about it. Her own newspaper, The North County Times, was forced to confront her over the issue. This is the same paper she was “nominatted” for a Pulitzer for! http://www.nctimes.com/news/lo...

Kit-Bacon would ramble on with this classic “Flip-Flop” and “Pass the Buck Moment” on October 14th, a statement so embarrassing even John Kerry might show a drop of emotion:

"I think it's important people understand the district board's role. We're also not privy to what's going on. However, as a public board, we are the public's direct access to the hospital. What we can do is document what we hear and hand it over to the CEO."

Her career as a public servant was over. A child dies on the floor of her hospital 8 months before and she's “not privy” to it? While the rest of America had to put up with another four years of W, at least Fallbrook could say good riddance to Kit-Bacon. Despite touting her experience (and sucking up to conservatives as a member of the “Fallbrook Chamber of Commerce”) she lost 62-37% in a landslide that would put Walter Mondale to shame. Her opponent only had one line under her description: “Certified Public Accountant.” Fallbrook hated Kit-Bacon so much they threw a “Healthcare Corporation Executive” out of office to go with a CPA...TO RUN A FUCKING HOSPITAL!!!!!!http://www.smartvoter.org/2004...

As a final, massive FUCK YOU to Kit-Bacon, the new board of directors, on their first meeting, would cancel the $5,000 A MONTH health care coverage for the five directors: http://www.nctimes.com/news/lo...

The “We are the 99” movement did not start in New York City, it started December 2004 when a Health Care Executive and Vaccine Marketer was ACTUALLY DENIED HEALTH CARE COVERAGE FOR INCOMPETENCE!

Following her departure from FFF, “1% Bacon” lived comfortable enough to become a full time writer and blogger with numerous different sites and affiliates. You must wonder if her thousands and thousands of posts, articles and writing pieces are really her personal reflections or are just to bury the results of her name in a Google search. At one point the word “Kit-Bacon” could have bypassed “Santorum” in vileness.

Somehow along the way Kit-Bacon must have received a message from God, not to help the poor, but to go back...TO COLLEGE. Is she hoping to use the experience to write her screenplay for Animal House 2? Ask yourself this...what the hell is a former Healthcare Executive, rich enough to give the maximum to numerous political candidates, doing attending Cal State San Marcos anyway? It's one step up from a community college! She now represents herself as a champion of “already-struggling, working- and lower-class students [excluded] from higher education” and has the balls to blame THE KOALA!?! THE KOALA didn't drive this country head-first into a wall...though they have driven cars into walls. GREEDY BASTARD ONE PERCENTERS, people *very* well off yet still take $1,000 a month healthcare insurance coverage paid for with public tax dollars like KIT-BACON GRESSITT DID!

Now Kit-Bacon is railing against these new election fraud allegations to draw traffic to her sites. Yet calloutthekoala has yet to break 100 followers on Facebook (watch: she will blame people not wanting to attach their name to the “hate tabloid” to avoid “KOALA PERSECUTION”) while THE KOALA has close to 5,000 friends and followers? Her Change.org petition took three months to get 1,000 online signatures...out of a whole 2.5 billion internet users. THE KOALA collected almost 3,000 physical signatures of UCSD students in A SINGLE WEEKEND to defend it's porno airing rights, an event Kit-Bacon still whines about to this day.

But Kit-Bacon can still become a good villain. She certainly needs the help burying dismal Google results, getting Facebook followers AND fixing elections. Once she graduates from college and does not have THE KOALA to base much of her life around, what will she do next? It's about time she looks to the future, and hires the only people unscrupulous enough to do her dirty work...THE ONE AND ONLY MOTHERFUCKING KOALA.

She can afford it.

Christopher Neal

Perhaps Mr. Weaver was influenced by the republican voter fraud from the 2000 presidential election and he just wanted to emulate our country's leadership is all...