Dan Harmon via Tumblr

"Ah, shit, I still haven't called my fucking Mom."

We've all experienced that moment, after hours in the air, of booting up our smartphone to discover we've missed the majorest news event since Hurricane Katrina. But Community creator Dan Harmon's in-flight ignorance last Friday extended beyond trending topics to his own employment status:

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Season 6, behind the scenes.

According to Glamour Magazine's wedding blog, two producers who met and courted each other while filming ABC's hit romance series The Bachelor (and The Bachelorette) are getting married in California this summer. And Chris Harrison, career goob behind the tearful interviews and "pack your bags" moments, will reportedly be officiating!

Guess the boy-meets-girl fairytale works out a little better without all the...

Fox

Show creator Matt Groening revealed this week that the location of the show that got its start via his "Life in Hell" comic strip in the local Reader newspaper, is named after a mythical town, Springfield, Oregon, that reminded him of his own hometown ...

Natasha Bishop

These were not, however, ordinary gatecrashers with good taste in tunes, a bottle of chianti in their Louis Vuitton bags, and their radios permanently tuned to Jason Bentley. No.

These were homeless folks:

WW II rages on in Hollywood.

The LAPD bomb squad rushed to a warehouse in the 6600 block of Lexington, reportedly declaring a "Code Five Edward situation" and evacuating nearby office buildings.

What could have caused such a commotion, in this land of sidewalk stabbings and ruby slippers hung on telephone wires?

Atlanta Honda

Lohan's Porsche, in better days.

Though her sex life is getting stranger and her face is bloating out of control (so much so that the paparazzi recently mistook her for Debbie Harry), Lindsay Lohan has avoided any major missteps with Los Angeles law enforcement these last few months.

James Cameron, drama queen.

This, according to Bruce Jones, CEO of Triton Submarines (and subject of this excellent Broward-Palm Beach New Times cover story). Jones' Florida-based company has likewise been working on a vessel that could withstand the immense pressure at the bottom of the Mariana Trench -- but unlike Cameron and Branton's one-man submersibles, Triton is constructing a ship that could carry multiple passengers down and provide them full visibility of the wonders that be.

Well in the case of Emerson College, whose mothership is situated in Boston, that day has come. On Thursday morning, Emerson officials, along with Councilman Eric Garcetti and L.A. Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, will be gathering in front of the patch of dirt at Sunset Boulevard and Gordon (right across from the Old Spaghetti Factory, which was ironically demolished in the dead of night last month to accomodate a new high-rise) for a groundbreaking ceremony. And for what do we break this ground?

Weinstein Co.

Berenice Bejo as Peppy Miller in 'The Artist.'

Except for these college kids, who happened to luck into the greatest movie of 2011!

We know, we know. Bight your knuckles. Swear at the gods. Because these L.A. students happened to get in on the internship of a lifetime:

E!

Sacha Baron Cohen spills ashes on Ryan Seacrest.

Originally, Cohen was banned from debuting his Dictator character (the star of his next mockumentary) at the awards show, reportedly because humorless Academy fogies suspected he was trying to pull a publicity stunt. (Duh.)

However, perhaps after realizing that the hype could be mutually beneficial...

Nip slip 2012?

Did Jennifer Lopez expose her nipple to a worldwide audience at the Oscars last night?

It's question numero uno after Lopez and Cameron Diaz presented awards for Best Makeup and Best Costume Design:

Halle Berry in 'X-Men: The Last Stand.'

Only days after the voters behind the Academy Awards were revealed as extremely white (94 percent), male (77 percent) and old (median age, 62), the UCLA Chicano Studies Research Center issued a report indicating that Oscar winners seem to reflect the body.

The brief, "Not Quite a Breakthrough: The Oscars And Actors of Color, 2002-2012," deflates any notion that 2002's big year for African Americans at the Academy Awards opened the doors of Hollywood to further gains by minorities:

Cohen as the General.

That's right, Aladeen said the Academy will face "unimaginable consequences" if he didn't get his passes by noon that day.

The organizers reportedly pulled his right to be on the red carpet. Why?

"Pirates of the Caribbean," one of the most pirated movies ever, still raked in billions.

Yet the film industry is sort of the original pirate, leeching off the public domain of creativity and making a killing off the genius of a few.

All this, laid out in a sweet new infographic from Paralegal.net:

Warner Bros.

But even if you can't afford the clothing expected to sell for between $400 and $2,000, you can take a look. Julien's Auctions will put the fashion on public display in the 90210.

Should be interesting. The death of Whitney Houston has inspired a fan response not seen since Michael Jackson passed in 2009:

Silly commoners with their silly street closures.

When the president breezes through town for some big Hollywood campaign cash, we get stuck on Wilshire or Santa Monica for a little longer than normal. Grumble grumble, etc. (And he's graciously got a tax-paid helicopter to take some of the pressure off.)

But when the Academy Awards (AHHHHH) set up shop outside/inside the Kodak Theater (AHHHHH) at the heart of crammy Hollywood ...

Mingle MediaTV

Jennifer Lawrence on the red carpet.

But if you look at the true ethnic makeup of the film industry, you might call it all talk, no action, because, if the voting membership of the motion picture academy is any sign, it's white, male and old:

indiewire

Shit just got real.

With Deadwood's David Milch on the screenplay and Miami Vice's Michael Mann in the director's chair, HBO's new ode to horse-racing was bound to be grittier and manlier than Cormac McCarthy' 5 'o' clock shadow.

But are they taking the realism too far? In a single season of shooting, Luck's pretend races have sent two animal actors...

Rajiv Patel

Brett Ratner pulled out of producing the show after uttering an anti-gay slur. Then onetime friend-of-the-tranny Eddie Murphy followed him out the door (irony?). Now it looks like The Help is poised to take home many a statuette, even though some (some?) African Americans aren't happy with a film by white folks, for white folks, about demeaning black work.

Who said bad news comes in threes?

Beverly Hills City Hall: a hotter version of ourselves.

And there is some of that. But little do the dreamers know that our slacker city government has let the roads deteriorate and the infrastructure crumble. Hollywood, especially, is a big ghetto mess of oil spots and fast-food trash.

So big-budget filmmakers have apparently resorted to dressing up nice neighboring towns and pretending they're Los Angeles: