10 Potluck Etiquette Rules

flickr slow food seacoast.jpg
Flickr user Slow Food Seacoast
As a follow-up to our 10 Handy Rules for Tipping, we bring you 10 Potluck Etiquette Rules. Because it's summer, and you're bound to be invited to a pot luck or two, as we were over the weekend. Lucky you.

1. Bring a dish. The official definition of a potluck is "a meal or party to which each of the guests contributes a dish," not a meal or party to which bringing a dish is optional. The latter is called a dinner party. Offering to bring a dish or a bottle of wine to a dinner party is polite, and you should always do that, too. At a potluck, bringing a dish is not polite. It is a requirement.

2. There are no exceptions to rule #1. Even at a potluck -- say, a 200+ person homebrew club party -- where there is a very small fee to offset the costs of supplies (plates, cups) and FOOD (hundreds of pieces of grilled chicken and burgers) because so many people disregard rule #1, you should still bring a dish.

3. Condiments do not count as a dish.

4. When the very nice, crazy generous hosts who have donated their backyard to hundreds of beer-stomping sneakers walk around the party asking for help, you offer to help. If they ask you to grill chicken but you don't want to smell like smoke all day, you grill chicken anyway. If they ask you to cook burgers but you are a vegetarian, you smile and cook burgers anyway, or you find someone else at the party willing to cook burgers for you. You do not simply say you are a vegetarian, turn your back and pour yourself another beer.

5. Rule #4 still applies -- more so, actually -- at a large potluck where there may be volunteer shifts that you may or may not have signed up for (set-up crew, grilling crew, serving crew, clean-up crew). If the lovely, generous hosts come around the party begging for help, you do not sit back and drink your beer and claim you did not sign up for that shift or make up an excuse ("I'm too drunk to help"). You offer to help.

6.
When the food begins to slowly trickle over from the kitchen to the buffet tables, a process that due to the sheer quantity of food is going to take 45 minutes because no one has followed rules #4 and 5, you do not jump up to be the first in line. A potluck is not an elementary school cafeteria where "I called it first" tactics preside. Nor do you simply stand in the line (which is now snaking around the corner because others have joined in once they see you make your move), drinking your beer while those half-dozen volunteers spend 45 minutes frantically trying to finish cooking and getting food on the table. You offer to help.


My Voice Nation Help
11 comments
Lauri
Lauri

We are going to have a Work potluck....my boss asked me to organize this and wants me to stress to everyone that they must bring something in order to eat...Is this in poor taste? I understand her frustration, but feel it is wrong to have to state this

Issue: the guys here always want to be a part of eating, yet the do not contribute.  

sinosoul
sinosoul

Can we have rule #8.1? Don't bring a complete SHAT dish so rule #8 is never activated? Marshmallow jello salad comes to mind, so does refried beans, canned green bean casserole... 

Dave Lieberman
Dave Lieberman

Green bean casserole HAS to be from canned beans. It doesn't taste right from fresh beans. I tried to gussy it up (homemade cream of mushroom soup, fresh-that-morning Blue Lake beans, homemade crispy onions) and it tasted awful and not right at all.

A few more rules to add:

11. Bus your own damn dishes. There are no maids.

12. DON'T PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE DAMN FOOD.

13. Bring everything needed to serve your food: spoons, spoon rest, whatever.

14. It's YOUR responsibility to keep your food appropriately hot or cold. It's reasonable to expect electricity to be available (maybe). It is NOT reasonable to expect the hosts to have stocked up on a hundred pounds of ice.

15. Environmental responsibility is awesome. If you bring a reusable dish, YOU are responsible for keeping an eye on it and, if you're lucky enough to "sell out" of the dish you brought, for washing it.

16. Grocery store chicken is not an acceptable dish to bring, because EVERYBODY brings the chicken from Albertsons with its mojo potatoes and its King's Hawaiian bread.

17. Just because you're bringing a six of beer does not exempt you from Rule #1.

18. If you accidentally bring the same thing as someone else (hello, Midwestern "fruit salad" with marshmallows and canned mandarin oranges), don't be a douche and move the other person's back. Either put yours next to it or put it somewhere else altogether.

19. This should be obvious, but covered-dish suppers (what Minnesotans call potluck) need to be self-service. Nobody is setting up a carving station for you, and if you have some weird need to plate things, do it ahead of time and put it on the tray.

20. The kitchen is reserved for logistics only. Your dish needs to be ready to go when you get there, or as close as you can manage. If you have to take over two burners of a four-burner stove in order to boil and sauce your pasta, you fail at potluck.

Jenn
Jenn

Yeah, well, in theory, agreed. But hey, if people can't cook, and they at least try (most folks don't even try), I give them kudos!

Ascattergood
Ascattergood

This is hilarious. I have potluck nightmares, doubtless due to a childhood spent in the upper Midwest, where potlucks functioned as the only reliable social events -- quilting bees and barn raisings being, sadly, somewhat hard to find. If one is not forced to eat from a vat of marshmallow jello salad, I consider a potluck a success.

davidstickel
davidstickel

Wow, quite the burn on PG and its members!  Sorry you didn't enjoy the later half of the day.I had a great time and thought that the food went off fine.  Except for the raw chicken.

Why would anyone want a vegetarian cooking their meat?

Jenn
Jenn

David-This wasn't directed at PG, I didn't mention them by name intentionally. It is the same experience I've had at gobs of potlucks, simply voicing a universal Potluck Universe complaint. The "share" aspect is sadly rarely present.

Elina Shatkin
Elina Shatkin

I love this list! May I add: A bag of crappy potato chips is not a dish. I once send out an invite for a turducken potluck (my roommate & I cooked the turducken, everyone else brought side dishes) about what did not count as a dish. I should have had to, but I did.

Jenn
Jenn

Hilarious. Heck, I'd bring my infamous way-too-time-consuming, very slow baked scalloped potatoes with various fall fruits if someone took the time to make turducken!

Ian
Ian

Jenn,  You're the best!  I should probably not point out that I did manage to snake first in line on Saturday because while guarding the food from people grabbing it while it was being brought to the table I wound up at the head of the line when Dean said GO!  But I do think I am the exception since every other year I am the cook and always ate last.

Jenn
Jenn

You are definitely the exception! You more than deserved a year off! We missed you, and need you as chef!

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

©2013 LA Weekly, LP, All rights reserved.
Browse Voice Nation
  • Voice Places Los Angeles

    Voice Places

    Find everything you're looking for in your city

  • Happy Hour App

    Happy Hour App

    Find the best happy hour deals in your city

  • Daily Deals

    Daily Deals

    Get today's exclusive deals at savings of anywhere from 50-90%

  • Best Of

    Best Of...

    Check out the hottest list of places and things to do around your city