Best Flaming Dinner Gift: Honey Pig

N. Galuten

A well-worn pig lighter.

There is a lot of Korean barbecue to eat in Los Angeles, and you've probably already decided which restaurant is your favorite. In fact, we think it's high time the city banished any residents who haven't formally declared their go-to galbi spot by now. Nonetheless any healthy, committed relationship should leave room for experimentation with others.

May we suggest Honey Pig. Or, as it's known to those who don't read Korean: "the place with the pig on its sign." You should know that we recommend Honey Pig not for their dome-shaped grills, nor the fried rice they make on it at the end of your meal (composed of leftover barbecue scraps, burnt bits, and meat juice residue). We most like them for their after-dinner gift, a small pink piggie lighter with the restaurant info printed across his side. When lit, twin flames shoot out from each nostril. There is also great sadistic pleasure in refilling wee porky, as the butane tube goes straight up his rectum.

N. Galuten

Insert butane here.

Yes, it's that time of year again, or almost. This is one of over 400 pieces that will be appearing in our upcoming Best of L.A. issue, out October 6th.