Uptight Mom Group Protests Schweddy Balls

By Shuji Sakai Mon., Oct. 24 2011 at 11:00 AM

Ben & Jerry's

Have you been looking long and hard for your Ben & Jerry's Schweddy Balls, only to go home with ice-cream blue balls instead? Us too. Last month, we told you about the official launch of the limited-release flavor. The B&J scoop shops always seem to be sold out, and we've never seen it in the freezer aisles of our neighborhood supermarkets.

It turns out some grocery stores have purposely held back the Schweddy Balls. The Associated Press reports they don't want the backlash from people who don't find fun in the tongue-in-cheek humor, such as a conservative Christian group called One Million Moms, which takes offense at the salty innuendo of the Saturday Night Live skit.

The Massachusetts grocery chains interviewed for the AP story don't specifically say whether or not they caved in due to the efforts of the Mississippi mom group, which doesn't accede that neither the SNL skit, nor the ice cream were intended for kids who still have a bedtime restriction.

One Million Moms take offense at a lot of things that don't jibe with their right-leaning Christian values, including the use of the phrase "Oh my God," in a Febreze commercial.

From their petition against Schweddy Balls:

In the past, Ben & Jerry's has released controversial ice creams, like a special edition of Chubby Hubby called Hubby Hubby last year which celebrated gay marriage. It seems that offending customers has become an annual tradition for Ben & Jerry's.

From their petition against Oreo Cookie commercials that use the phrase "shut the front door":

[Nabisco]... is running an ad for their new Oreo Fudge Cremes with the phrase "Shut the Front Door." In today's teen jargon, that phrase is a euphemism for "Shut the F*@k Up!"

The ad begins with a typical family eating Oreo cookies in their kitchen at home when the mom blurts this out. Moms find this offensive, and teenagers are admitting they know what "Shut the Front Door" stands for. OMM finds it hard to believe that Kraft is unaware what this statement means.

OMGWTF, OMM? What planet are you from where imaginary foul language is worth a write-in campaign? Ben & Jerry's has always been transparent about their support for progressive social causes, and if you (understandably) don't want to give a left-leaning ice cream company your business, simply don't. But keep your hands off our Schweddy Balls.

Grocers, grow a pair and stand up for the other 99% of your customers who want their Schweddy Balls.

Shuji Sakai writes about the Ke$ha of breakfast burritos and potty-mouthed, mother-flippin' ice creams. Follow him on Twitter and professorsalt.com

Tags:

Alec Baldwin, Ben & Jerry's, Controversy, Febreze, Ice Cream, One Million Moms, Oreo, Saturday Night Live, Schweddy Balls, Shuji Sakai, SNL

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I for one find the humor in Shweddy Balls and can't wait to have some. But I do have to say a big CONGRADULATIONS to One million moms. Because of their efforts, more people are going to find out about this particular flavor and buy it just to tick them off. If buying a pint of Shweddy Balls is going to corrupt your kid and send a bad message then you weren't that great of a parent to begin with. The more you warn against something the more people will want it. Read up on prohibition and see how well that worked out. Take a deep breath and it will all be over soon, until then. may all of your balls be Shweddy ones.

squeedleyspooch

This is just silly. How about, just put this particular flavor on the top shelf, where kids are less likely to see it. Should they stop carrying condoms because you don't want your child to know about sex? Ooh, or maybe stores should stop carrying alcohol cause your kid might be curious about it one day. If these moms spent less time petitioning stupid 'causes' like a tongue in cheek ice cream name and more time actually being a parent, something as minor as this would not be an issue. Get over it and Shut the Front Door.

frank uible

Anything which offends One Million Moms can't be all bad.

TheTruth

Stupid Christians...always have to ruin things for everyone else. If you don't like it, just ignore it.

FlagBearer89

Hey, that's what they do when it comes to science like evolution, motion of the solar system, shape of the planet, age of the universe, and global climate change...why can't it work for ice cream?

Grimes Liz

People like omm who get so upset over the name of an ice cream like schweedy balls need to get a life. Seriously

Doctorwho1

You know, Shuji Sakai can write whatever she wants because this is a free country. But for the record, the majority of the people don't want shite like this staring them in the face at the grocery store. So Shuji, please take your head out of your arse and write something useful. All too often these days people think that they can say anything they want to anyone they want without consequence in the name of blogging. Well remember that this is just your own personal opinion so blog on without using common sense or what little brain you have. Another reason this country is in the shape it's in is because of narrow minded twats like this. She can sit behind her computer screen and write anything she likes, but people like this often don't have the balls to speak like this publicly. People like Shuji sicken me when I think about the men who died for this country's freedoms and they're abused like this in such a henous way.

KrisDub

I'm dying to know how men who died for this country's freedom are being abused? Pretty sure they died so that we're free to like ice cream with irreverent names.

Spammymcdoo

"But for the record, the majority of the people don't want shite like this staring them in the face at the grocery store." - says who?

Spammymcdoo

I for one would love to have shweddy balls staring me in the face everywhere I go.

Keenan

Haha its a man.

Shuji Sakai

I take it you got your PhD from The School for Kids Who Can't Read Good. Take a breath and glance at the very last sentence.

Shuji Sakai is a he, and he is speaking publicly. Welcome to our free, liberal alt-weekly supported by marijuana clinics and escort services, and have a nice day.

H. G. Orwells

What are your top reasons for believing that "Doctorwho1" is NOT a typical ultra-conservative, left-wing bigot trying to make actual Conservatives look bad? This is the Web. Very little is what it seems to be.