August 2006 Archives

Blogs

Hellbilly Poetry

by Caroline Ryder

August 30, 2006 9:08 AM

I went to Sunset Junction on Sunday and while I found headliners The Cramps to be quite boring, I was truly moved by the hellbilly thrash of Hank III. So much so, I wrote a poem about it, called I Love Your Death Metal. I think it's rather good.

I love your death metal. / Your square chin and bloodied cheek. /Your cunt in my country, / Your dick in my dixie / And your middle finger in my face, /Full of grace.

Round and round, you swing your hair - / A high-speed propeller in the air. / Then - you stop and stare. / "Eat. Fuck. Kill," you growl, "EAT. FUCK. KILLLLL." / (Which makes perfect sense to me / 'Cause we're all animals, you see.)

D'you think your grandpa would be proud? / Or would he say "son, it's too loud"? / And your daddy – / Does he cover his ears? / Curl his toes and lock up his guitar, / Wonderin' why his boy went too far?

Do you think about him, crushed in a car? / Is that why, my friend, is that why? / Is that why you scream instead of cry? / Nashvillian pain, passed on down the chain - / How much did you have to endure / To sing death metal songs so pure?

Tha End.

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Smokin' Safari Sam's

by Caroline Ryder

August 26, 2006 12:08 PM

The Safari Sam's official launch party last week was smokin' – literally. A speaker exploded in to flames half way through the night during live rock karaoke band S.W.E.A.T's heartfelt rendition of something by Pink Floyd. "It was hot," says Chad Forello, Safari Sam's co-manager dude, who performed his own take on Elvis by singing "I Cant Help Falling in Love With Jew", a song he dedicated to Mel Gibson.

The open vodka bar came courtesy of New Zealand's 42 Below (the name supposedly refers to the southern latitude where it is produced and also to its 42% alcohol content). They supplied party goers - among them DJ Frankie Chan, Adam 12 of She Wants Revenge, scenester/make-up artist Giddle Partridge and local up and comers SaberTooth Tiger – with refreshment. We loved the passion fruit flavor and salute 42 Below for filling the sad gap left by Ketel One after we realized it is, in fact, lame. Angel City, a local brewery and winner of the LA County Fair Beer Competition, added to the inebriation with their crisp European style ales and pilsner. And American Spirit threw in a couple dozens packs of their healthy organic cigarettes (if its free, I'll believe anything you tell me). Special thanks to Elizabeth Chase for organizing all the refreshments!The Indie 103.1 and LA Weekly sponsored launch party came three months after the club actually opened – but hey, who's counting. Not The Dares, a trio of 16-year-old pop punk heart throbs, who assumed that because it was a launch, it was also the opening night. "We're so happy to be the first band to play this stage!" they yelled. We forgave them because they're unbelievably cute, as pointed out by co-Emcee Alexis Florio, who invited the boys to call her "in four years. Actually, make it two." The night started with my fellow LA Weekly Style Councilors Steffie and Lina behind the decks under their pseudonyms Miss Treat and DJ Double Elle. Chad, my only source for this story, was impressed. "They played basically my entire record collection. They started off with Raw Power by the Stooges and segued into Gang of Four and all kinds of punk and post punk music that has basically shaped the entire musical landscape of now." Effusive praise indeed from a man who has barely cracked a smile since ripping both biceps while lifting tables at the club two months ago.The party featured on-stage performances by burlesque impresaria Miss Kitty Diggins and her Dandy performers. One of them, Prince Poppycock, resplendent in a Louis XIV wig and china white powder face, opened up the karaoke with a divine rendition of Bowie's Rebel Rebel. Me and Alexis concluded the karaoke with a drunken interpretation of Fuck The Pain Away, before introducing the last DJ of the night, electronica guru and URB magazine cover boy Boom Bip, who recently toured with Interpol and opened for The Orb at Walt Disney Concert Hall. So drunk were we by this point, we entirely forgot to invite Safari Sam's owner Sam Lanni to the stage to talk about the club for a few minutes, as originally planned. But, as he told us the following morning, "I was trashed, you were trashed, everyone was trashed. Who cares – it was a good night."

Posted by Caroline Ryder, all photos by Rae/Threat www.threat.tv

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Girls In Films

by Steffie Nelson

August 13, 2006 11:08 AM

Karl & Chanel blog2.jpg Last week at Cinespace, fashion blogger Diane Pernet and photographer Dino Dinco debuted the You Wear It Well fashion film festival, presenting an opportunity for L.A. fashionistas to see rarely screened films and get inside the minds behind the mode. It was a very haute affair for the City of Angels (not a skatewear video in sight), and the event brought out stylist Arianne Phillips and her pal Jeremy Scott, Booth Moore from the L.A. Times, and Cameron Silver of Decades. Viewers sat through three hours of shorts that went from silly ("Hello Kitty's Birthday," featuring a model in a big papier mache head) to sublime ("Diversity is a Form of Wealth," Nick Knight's moving look at a John Galliano runway show that used circus performers and regular folk instead of models on the catwalk). Liam Sullivan's goofy ode to "Shoes" won the audience award, and although I cracked up along with everybody else I couldn't help but notice that the fetishized footwear was more Payless than Prada. Jeremy Scott's soap opera spoof "Starring" deliberately trampled all over that line, and his A-list cast included Tori Spelling, Asia Argento, China Chow, Lisa Marie, and Amber Valletta in faux commercials for "Couture" - "when I get cramps."

I cast my vote for Ruben Toledo's "Fashionation" (still of Karl Lagerfeld and the Chanel team, pictured above), a whimsical, animated history of French fashion that began by defining couture, ran through the alphabet from Azzedine Alaia to Balenciaga to Dior to Gaultier to Sonia Rykiel (who said that "the sweater is a part of my soul") and and finished with "Zee end." It was absolutely adorable, and an excellent primer too! Diane Pernet's "Adventure of Pleasure (Gumball Rally)" was a documentary style look at designer Eley Kishimoto's participation in the Gumball Rally car race.

Although many of the films were international, Pernet's partner Dino Dinco said he wanted to kick off the event in the capital of cinema. "It would have been almost too obvious to start it in New York," he said. "Plus, the interesting fashion is starting on the West Coast." Of course, we already knew that, right?

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Milking It

by Lina Lecaro

August 9, 2006 6:08 PM

It was my birthday this past weekend, and though the Leo in me usually takes a whole week to celebrate, this year I've got another birth on my mind- the one I'll be enduring when my little one comes in early November. Still, I had a hubby who wanted to spoil me and I just couldn't let the double whammy of being a pregnant lady and a birthday girl at the same time go by without taking a little advantage. As I said, I am a Leo.

So it was off to Tiffany's, the famed jewelry store, which I've shockingly never been to though I've lived in LA all my life. I love hearts, but I didnt want the typical Tiffany thick chain heart stuff that every spoiled rich girl in Beverly Hills gets when she turns 13. Seriously, the crowded shop was teenybopper central- and this stuff is expensive! The Frank Gehry line was too arty farty for me and the diamond stuff... well, maybe I'll go for that after I pop out the kid. I opted for a beautiful sterling silver pendant on a delicate chain with a column of three hearts stacked on top of each other. For me, it symbolizes my new family to be. So sweet, it makes ya wanna puke huh?
Since I've never done the Rodeo Drive stroll, I decided to check out all the fabulous designer stores filled with gorgeous stuff I can't afford, and though I didn't think I'd see any celebrities (it was the weekend after all), I thought there'd be at least a few plastic surgery junkies toting their Louis Vuittons around. But Rodeo on a Saturday is more tourist than ritz: it was a sea of flip flops and bermuda shorts, Disneyland for window shoppers.

After perusing Dolce and Gabbana, Versace and Gucci, it looks like leopard print stuff is back again (yay!) and gold is the metal of choice (boo! it's so gaudy). I also checked out the new Prada skirt exhibit which displays some of the fashion house's best known prints as spinning lamps and flattened out circle-like paintings. Here's a shot of my favorite, the classic lip print skirt, which I have coveted ever since it came out. Ebay searches for it have been fruitless thus far. Not that I'd be able to find one that fits right now anyway.

Keeping with the I'm-a-starlet theme, I decided to dine at Geisha House on Hollywood Blvd. for dinner that night, and again, it being a Saturday, there were no Entourage-like posses to be seen. In fact, the weekend warrior "special occasion" crowd was in full effect (awkward-looking first dates, a few other birthday parties, and 3 bridal shower dinners complete with blow-up dolls).
Didn't matter though. The atmosphere was bumpin,' the food was suprisingly good (though a little pricier than normal Japanese food) and the company (my lovin' spouse) was the best! Soon enough romantic dinners, much less entire days of doing whatever my heart desires, will be a thing of the past... or so everyone keeps telling me. Dunno if that'll really be the case, but after 37 years of it being all about me, I think I'm ready.

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Just Cause She Dance the Go-Go

by Linda Immediato

August 3, 2006 3:08 PM

Apparently, the ladies love songs about strippers falling in love. "Perfect Gentleman!!" they screamed at Wycleff Jean during his performance at the Saturn, Hurley, X Games 12 party (whew, that was a mouthful of sponsorship). And, ok, I was one of them. I think I've cried listening to that song. I don't know if it's when Cleff offers her 20 grand to show him a little more skin, or when he called up his mama and told her he's in love with a stripper yo, but something about the ditty is romantic, a Showgirls meets Cinderella story. So when Wycleff invited anyone who was game up on stage during that number, I jumped, literally, at the chance to shake it like I got no bones in my body and I was made to be a celebrity with him and a handful of hot chicks.

I have to admit, at first it was sad seeing Wycleff walk out down the runway, alone, with a big ass Saturn poster behind him. It felt a little "Spinal Tap and Puppet Show-ish." And then he performed "Ready or Not," with Lauren Hill's voice looped in the background, something about it was depressing, like watching an only child play with imaginary friends. Jean didn't seem to mind though, he just kept berating his roadies, and plugging Saturn.

Corporate sponsorship parties can make you a little sick, this one did have great food, great cocktails, but it also had a Hurley fashion show featuring models popping out of Saturn's new hybrid car, the effect of which was like watching an Old Navy ad, crossed with a circus, crossed with a Chevy Commercial (I will say Hurley's come a long way from surf trunks and bikinis). And of course there were performances by Djs, the guys who sing the theme song for The OC and Wycleff. Despite all the pushing of product, Wycleff gave it up, played Carnival, Guantanamera, he even performed cunnilingus on his guitar, and hip hopped our socks off— it was enough to make you forget you were in a parking lot behind the El Capitan.

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