Thoughts From A Random Black Guy: A Poem About Herman Cain, aka H-Money

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Frank Miles
[Editor's note: Odd Future member Lionel Boyce writes a weekly column for West Coast Sound. His archives are available here.]

"Stupid people are ruining America" is probably the smartest thing I've heard Herman Cain say. Unfortunately, I believe he belongs in that group.

When I first saw this guy on TV, I thought they'd let some ignorant old black dude on TV talk shit about politics. Once I found out he was running for the presidency, however, all I could do was shake my head.

Herman Cain reminds me of the old black guys who sit in front of Starbucks or hang out at the barbershop and just talk crap all day. They are mad at the world for no reason, and 97 percent of the time have no idea what the fuck they are talking about. The way I see it, Herman Cain has become the spokesperson for those people.

I wanted to write a poem, but I decided to let my Asian amigo Matt write it for me. (He's really Mexican.)

When Mayans made the calendar and started to dissect it,
They ended at 2012 just in case Herman gets elected
I'm occupying my city, hoping I don't get arrested
Ignorance spreads quicker than AIDS, I'm hoping you all get tested

Not in your local clinic but at the voting booth
Five fingers per hand but I'm only showing two
We see past your glasses and those pinstripe suits,
Uncle Cain or Uncle Thomas, yes I'm talking to you

"If you're not rich, blame yourself," one of his many quotes
Hard to agree when our economy is the Titanic of sinking boats
Only those beyond conservative will cheer and listen
Now it's beyond obvious that there's too many chefs in your campaign kitchen


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20 comments
cARTier
cARTier

very well spoken. Wise Kids.

ChazB
ChazB

anyone know where i can find the paper version of this??

Ladderdale33
Ladderdale33

Wish the poem wasnt broken up into two pages. regardless well done my man!

indigenousjesse
indigenousjesse

Aw heck naw that boy is raw! Anyone dissing getting the stone cold stunner, peoples elbow, and tombstone!

MGA
MGA

Lyrical!! too short though, i'd like more....

Frankie O
Frankie O

usually poetry is all controversy, but this... i really liked this.

TD83
TD83

I wonder what race the poet is, i bet he's not even black. Still impressed, i just dont know how to take it.

OldHag46
OldHag46

Youth in Revolt, I LIKE!

JaredWolf
JaredWolf

that Mayan line was raw! *googles more work from matthew castellanos*

N.Simone
N.Simone

Nice to see poetry well-represented, he def did that

Twilliams901
Twilliams901

Dude, that was wack.  Now give me my stunner!

K6E6V6IN
K6E6V6IN

Lboy is Castellanos in OF?! He should be the balance is swag.

Vanessa W.
Vanessa W.

"that is how to grip a pimp Cain"(cane). Ha! Clever!

Read4fun
Read4fun

many intense lines for a 16-line poem. Uber impressed.

Deon Davis
Deon Davis

i like that poem very well spoken

oh and fuck Herman Cain

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