Why This Song Sucks: "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch" Is Hatemongering

[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"

Atmospherics: Admittedly, this is pretty brilliantly composed. It is moody and fun and clever.

History: Duh. From the cartoon special for How The Grinch Stole Christmas! that first ran on TV in the sixties. It was written by Dr. Seuss and sung by Thurl Ravenscroft, most famous for having been the voice of Tony the Tiger for more than 50 years. That's where the trickery begins though. Don't assume that because one of America's most beloved mascots is tangentially involved that this is not entirely evil. Have you even ever listened to the lyrics? It's pretty much the meanest diss song of all-time. Tupac heard it and was like, "Yo, don't you think this is a little harsh?"

Tupac.jpg

Scientific Analysis: Every kid (in America, anyway) has heard this song. And everyone thinks it's just about the cutest thing in the world. But you know what this is? Hatemongering. Like a motherfucker. And why, because he doesn't look like a Who? So, what does that mean -- who's next on the list? Mexicans? That's not very chillwave, bro.

Whos.jpg
Who thugs, probably about to perpetrate a hate crime against a Mexican because he made a joke about Boxing Day or something. (Art by Ian Leino.)
The Grinch is trying to steal Christmas? No shit he was trying to steal Christmas. He had all of those Who bastards down there in their posh little private community talking shit about him all day. What else was he supposed to do? He couldn't just sit there and take it. That would have probably inspired the Who's to sing "You're A Pussy, Mr. Grinch" or something.

A closer look at some of the lyrics from this brochure of hate literature:

"Your brain is full of spiders."

Yo, how about some consideration? What if it's a medical illness? What if those are cancer spiders? You're seriously making fun of a guy with brain cancer? Cool, cool. Oh, hey, do me a favor. When you get to Hell, ask Satan how your mom is doing.

"You're soul is an appalling dump heap."

His soul? It wasn't enough for you with the cancer? The hatred here has transcended the physical realm. We're into existential hate, the highest level of hatedom.

"Your heart is an empty hole."

ORLY? Let me look. Nope... nope. Wait.... I think there's something in there... yep... here it comes... oh, I see it now. It's a "Fuck you."

GrinchGraph.jpg
Sadly, the indifference towards The Grinch's plight has spilled into my own home
"You nauseate me."

I mean, you don't just say that to another living thing. It's not even clever. It's just hurtful.

My Voice Nation Help
7 comments
Guest
Guest

How's your script coming?

Bryon Cannon
Bryon Cannon

Interesting, but I don't believe the Whos of Whoville are the ones dissing the Grinch. That's the Omniscient Narrator. Any village of people who could celebrate Christmas without presents and roast beast wouldn't trash anyone this way.

yeeee
yeeee

The funniest part was the uncle eddy excerpt.

Neil
Neil

While I feel you're looking way too deep into this, I must admit, I did get a good laugh out of this, so while I wouldn't say I agree with this article, I did find it amusing in a good way.

Santa Claus
Santa Claus

This is the stupidest article i have ever read. Can't believe i wasted three minutes on this piece of crap. Who ever published this is an even bigger A-hole. Get a life douchebags.

Shea Serrano
Shea Serrano

You are far more ornery than I remember, Santa.

From the Vault

 

Clubs

Los Angeles Event Tickets
Browse Voice Nation
  • Voice Places Los Angeles

    Voice Places

    Find everything you're looking for in your city

  • Happy Hour App

    Happy Hour App

    Find the best happy hour deals in your city

  • Daily Deals

    Daily Deals

    Get today's exclusive deals at savings of anywhere from 50-90%

  • Best Of

    Best Of...

    Check out the hottest list of places and things to do around your city