Michael Jackson's "Wanna Be Startin' Something": Why This Song Sucks

Correction: @WTF_Over

Oh no OF COURSE you are a disturbed character!

Oh no OF COURSE you are a disturbed character!

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These comments are WAY better than the article.  Carry on my good people.  R.I.P MJ!

Hideously unfunny and not clever in the least. They should hire a 10 year-old to write about farts, that would be way more funny than this disaster. It really doesn't matter to me if you make fun of Michael Jackson but my god, this was just bad, bad writing. Really reads like someone did way too much blow and therefore thinks their lame jokes are HILARIOUS.

Sorry, WHO green lights...

What an embarrassing pile of dog shit excuse for music journalism. What are you, 12? Why green lights this shit?

Why do they let people write about music they clearly don't understand?  Filling space with stultifying minute detail about MAN ERECTION?  Is this supposed to be amusing?  Someone needs to wake the editor who is asleep at the wheel.  

Nothing going to be started by you Shea.

 Shea Serrano        never in this life time will you ever accomplish what MJ has. never will you have the fame and the power MJ had. when he died the world literally stopped! farrah fawcett died that day, we were at war, along with every thing else going on in the world, but  everyone was talking about MJ. all over the world people came out in droves to mourn MJ and to celebrate his music and his life! flash mobs at mall, in the middle of the street were crying and doing michael jackson dances. during the trial, people flew to the US from other countries just to stand outside the court room! it may never happen, but a member of congress suggested making permanent a Michael Jackson day! MJ broke records only to be matched by Whitney Houston! another great singer and tragic lost. this country thought they had something in elvis, who stole his dance moves from blacks! this country thought they had something in the beatles until Mike and Whitney came along and broke all of their records! I could talk forever about both of their accomplishments like Whitney singing the star spangled banner like it was never sang before or since!  Her performance reached the Top 20 on the US Hot 100, making her the only act to turn the national anthem into a pop hit of that magnitude.  Rolling Stone commented that "her singing stirs such strong patriotism. and she was on drugs then.  Her performance ranked No. 1 on the 25 most memorable music moments in NFL history list. VH1 listed her performance as one of the greatest moments that rocked TV. She and MJ are in the book of world records. people were upset when the flags in jersey were lowered for her. oh well! she more than deserved it! how many others received that honor! other than crackhead elvis.

MJ and Whitney had issues as most do. some handled theirs better, some did worse. but never will you or any one else belittle them or minimize who they were! there has been no one like them! they continue to be awesome role models like our great president Barack Obama. who is great and unique in his own right!  Love always to Whitney, MJ, and the Obamas!

These are my favourite articles on the blog. Because the writer is so blatently trolling you and still you commenters are acting all hurt. Mission accomplished.

Wanna Be Startin' Something doesn't suck...you do.

Calm down folks.  This is obviously a satire of the "Honey Badger" genre, and right now the guy is giggling at all the overzealous MJ-fan hysterics that have resulted from his Red Bull fueled random non-rant.

I'm a huge MJ fan, and love "Wanna Be...", but this is still fairly funny.  Don't get me wrong, it's stupid and I have no idea how LA Weekly sanctioned it, but you can't call it hating if he starts with calling MJ awesome, ends with calling him Boss, and in the middle goes perpendicular about homoerotic reactions to football.  This was obviously written as an excuse to print the word "ERECTION" several times and to create a flowchart ending with "You're a vegetable".  

I get it.  Write on, kid.

This was one of the dumbest things I ever read 1/3 of.

Hi, read your article it is really funny and I am sure you really do understand what the song was talking about ya know people starting stuff by talking trash, having babies when you can't feed yourself ya know real stuff that most folks can relate too. But I'm sure you wrote this to get attention you couldn't be that much of a shllot; and when he says you're a vegatable this means 'you're stupid.

Haha, I read these articles just to laugh at such stupidity.

YOU FUCKING HATING DOUSHE BAG!!! I'M SO SICK AND TIRED OF PEOPLE HATING ON MICHAEL JACKSON BEFORE AND AFTER HIS PASSING. PEOPLE ALWAYS WANTED TO COME UP BY TALKING SHIT ABOUT HIM!YOU'RE JUST A LOSER TRYING TO GET ATTENTION WHETHER POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE. NOW YOU GOT YOUR 5 MINUTES OF SHAME SO I SUGGEST YOU GET A REAL JOB AND QUIT TRYING TO COME UP OFF OTHER PEOPLE!!! MICHAEL JACKSON WAS AND ALWAYS BE " THE KING" ALL OF HIS MUSIC ARE MASTER PIECES, SO SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY YOU LOSER!!!!!

Whoever wrote this is seriously a hater & doesn't know music. He didn't literally mean "You're a vegetable." After that he says, "They still hate you. You're a vegetable." Which means, he's metaphorically speaking. He also says "They eat off of you" Get what I'm saying?  YOU need to reread the lyrics. Your article sucks ass.

Are you entering this in some contest for the the most ignorant article or the most crass one ?Maybe you miss the meaning of this song because you work for media and are immersed in all the BS of the biz.Guess you dodn't dance much either because "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin" is a great song to dance to.Oh, and guess what ? This song took on renewed meaning when it was deliberately chosen as the opening song for This Is It. You wouldn't understand but you just might someday.

uummm simply put..you and your writing suck..not enough room on the internet for your useless commentary.. 

This Guy doesn't understand Pop plain and simple

The guy who written this article clearly did it to get some attention. MJ was an amazing talent and this guy clearly has no idea about  that. If you like MJ or not " Wanna Be Startin" is a classic MJ song and no one can deny that. Stars of today do there best to create the magic of the Thriller Album and they all fail because MJ was one of a kind.

Spare me-- If you are too dense, to understand - what Michael Jackson was writing and singing about in this song. Then, you have my sympathy!  And I suggest, that you find something useful to do with your time- instead of writing such an ignorant article

OMG the journalist is a TOOL! an utter DRIP! HAHA what are you going on about mate? you told us to listen to the lyrics but you clearly did not do this yourself! when michael is talking about Vegetables he is talking about PEOPLE! people who live Vegetable lives and dont think for themselves and they need to wake up!Also you majorly failed with your MAN ERECTION elaboration ... I will only let you in on a little secret ... no one else gets them!!!! you are in fact a HOMOSEXUAL. Screwing! 

What a pointless article! I can barely understand what this guy is trying to say... Were you on drugs when you wrote this shit? "Wanna be startin' something" is a classical MJ song and you clearly don't understand the meaning of it. You seems well informed about this MAN ERECTION thing, this says a lot about you. But you should also inform and educate yourself about music before writing pointless things.

"Why This Song Sucks" is perhaps the worst part of the LA Weekly, for the following reasons: 

1. This is not "science," it's bullshit logic by people who have no knowledge of anything. 2. You guys know absolutely nothing about music.3. Like 98% of rock journalists, you are judging "music" by lyrical content alone. Hello? It's fucking MUSIC, not poetry.4. Where's the analysis of chord progression? Melodic/harmonic content? How do the sounds fall in the frequency spectrum? Have you measured the average RMS level of the recording? Oh, right, you have absolutely no fucking clue about what any of those things are.5. Again, you guys know absolutely nothing about music. 

I get a MAN ERECTION thinking about punching you in the face

Well you didn't achieve the man or erection you were looking for from me! Wanna be starting something from MJ rules! Twitter: @tsairox

The most pointless article ever, and it was obvously written with this title to get hits because everyone knows MJ is still the most popular artist of all time even aftrer his death, so I don't even give a damn about what he says because WBSS is all about crap like this. MJ will always be the King of Pop.

WELL MICHAEL JACKSONS SONG ROCKS. HE HAS MORE TALENTED THAN EVERY OTHER ARTIST OUT THERE. THIS ARTICLE SUCKS AND HAS ALOT OF JEOLOUSLY TO IT. WHEN IT COMES TO MICHAEL JACKSON ABOUT ANY BLOGS OR JOURNALIST WRITTING ABOUT HIM OR HIS NEGATIVE. THESE PEOPLE WILL DO OR SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HIM FOR MONEY AS IN PROFITING OFF HIS DEATH. SO THIS ASSWHOLE SHOULD STFU ABOUT SAYING MJ'S SONG SUCKS. BECAUSE HIS SONG ROCKS AND ITS VERY POPULAR TO HIS OTHER SONGS ON THE SAME ALBUM.  SO FUCK YOU U   JEOLOUS HATER YOUR ARTICLE IS THE ONE THAT SUCKS. YOU GET O RATING FROM ME ON THIS STUPID ARTICLE. MJ GETS 5 STARS OF RATING FROM ME BECAUSE HIS SONG IS GREAT AND IT ROCKS.

The song rocks! Rather you should ask yourself why you suck and ponder on this!

enough already with dicing michael jackson none of the artists male or female other than janet jackson can ever match up to him. i hope one day his kids surpass his talent and genious.

wtf. the song is a classic. you seriously dont know the meaning of the song you douche. And why are you giving us a lesson on man erection. that is just disturbing. wtf do you mean men give other men salutes through erections. which world are you living in. and for your own safety dont ever tell anyone your saluting him through an erection.  

Stop the hating on MJ please! Clearly "Wanna Be Starting Something" is a classic song. Not just because of the rhythms & sounds, but of it's lyrical content. The song is genius!!!

This is possibly the worst article I've ever read in my life! Its all over the place, it doesn't actually make any points about the song or any music for that matter. Most of it was about your stupid man erection theory. You can't say a song sucks, that you're going to prove it with science, then go off topic completely! Boring and pointless article.

One of MJ's sickest songs ever! Nothing about it sucks. One hook after another after another after another. Every rhythm, every synth line, every vocal part, every guitar part is a hook and they each hit immediately after the previous hook. It's probably the funkiest song I've ever heard and unlike anything I've heard before or after it's creation. People like Pharrell Williams have been trying to duplicate it ever since. 

My dear friend let me set the record straight for you. When Michael Jackson wrote the lyrics "you're vegetable'' he was definitely not referring to a vegetable. '' You're vegetable is a metaphor that was used to describe how mass media, television and sensational press (like this article) can defame a famous person and how easily at the same can tear down his career and eat him like a vegetable.So now my dear friend I want you to study all of the above and learn them by heart you are going to sit on a test on Monday morning.

In the true spirit of the song, my guess you suceeded in starting something. Kudos. Or should I say, hee-hee.