Skrillex's 'First of the Year': Why This Song Sucks

By Shea Serrano Wed., Mar. 28 2012 at 9:25 AM

[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Skrillex's "First of the Year"

History: There were some remarkable musical things happening in London right around the beginning of this century and a guy from Los Angeles maybe heard some of them and then he got an interesting haircut and then he made "First of the Year" and everyone was like, "Holy fuck. This is amazing."

Atmospherics: Digital melodicism; amber pianos; ambient wind tunnel spookiness; RAHRAHRAHRAHs; VHGHHHHHHs; !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!s.

Scientific Analysis: Now, duh, "First of the Year" is cool. That seems clear. Skrillex took a bunch of things that didn't go together and stacked them on top of each other, which is a shitty methodology for making a sandwich but is apparently aces for making dubstep tracks.

Oh, FYI, combining foodstuffs remains to be the premise for my greatest scientific failure to date. I thought that since I enjoy Kool-Aid, and since I enjoy beef-flavored Ramen Noodles, beef-flavored Kool-Aid would be like if you could somehow combine receiving oral sex with regular sex. I was, as it were, mistaken.

Incidentally:

At the Serrano household, the rule is, if the kid asks for it after we've warned him that he doesn't want it, then we give it to him. This is also referred to as the "I Bet He Won't Ask To Touch The Iron Again" rule.

Tags:

First of the Year, Johnny Depp, Skrillex

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uhhhhhhh

oooh i see what you did there

Killyourself

pretty much the worst thing i've ever read. nice work.

merica

was this your attempt to flood your reddit account with up-votes after "accidentally" making a meme chart with interchangeable bullshit? please tell me where you got your degree I want to get one for my leopard gecko

Weezboi21

this article doesn't even address why you think the song sucks. you're a terrible writer. why did you waste half a page with a couple charts involving beef flavored kool-aid? that idea is neither funny nor is it relevant to the topic of your story. you have no idea of how music is produced.

Nobodylikesyou

this article is a waste. even though i agree the song isn't that good, the article about it is even worse

tika

found this to be pretty stupid. nothing amusing about reading an article that aimlessly jumps from topic to topic without covering the topic at hand..