[Editor's Note: Shea Serrano sometimes writes about Why This Song Sucks, and sometimes about his hilarious and poignant life and times. Better put your shoes on because your socks are about to be blown off.]

Last year, Kendrick Lamar released good kid, m.A.A.d. city, his gorgeous proper debut album and the best rap project of the year. Late Monday, he released the video for "Bitch, Don't Kill My Vibe," the most soundly executed track on gkmc.

You can see it below, and you will see that it possesses nearly the exact opposite characteristics that make his lyrics so vital. It is unfortunate. Let's walk through it.

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Miguel

[Editor's Note: Shea Serrano sometimes writes about Why This Song Sucks, and sometimes about his hilarious and poignant life and times. Better put your shoes on because your socks are about to be blown off.]

Song: Miguel's "How Many Drinks"

History: This song came out and now they play on the radio a lot and so everyone is kind of realizing HOLY FUCK THIS IS BAD.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears regularly on West Coast Sound.]

Song: Justin Timberlake, "Suit & Tie," featuring Jay-Z

History: "Suit & Tie" is the first song from Justin Timberlake's new album(!), The 20/20 Experience. People were super excited about the song before it was released, and I guess some still are* given that it's broken a few records since it came out, but a lot of people are wondering why it wasn't called "Shit & Tie" instead.

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Welcome to another installment of the worst rap songs of the year, brought to you by Why This Song Sucks. They are all here this year: The all-the-way aged king, the suddenly mortal demigod, the former darling, the current darling, the most successful female rapper of the past decade, the global megastar, the lovable Bronx fat man, the incorrigible L.A. white girls, a goddamn cat; all of them, more.

See also: *The Worst Rap Tracks of 2011
*The Best Rap Singles of 2012

Guest appearances by Brad Pitt, Arsenio Hall, Clint Eastwood , Prince, the Pakistani guy from Seinfeld, Kristen Wiig, Eddie Murphy, Nic Cage, the kid from Boy Meets World, the guy from Entourage that helped Vince nearly ruin his everything; all of them, more. These are the ten worst rap songs of 2012.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday. However, this week we're utilizing science to explain why a song is goddamn amazing.]

Song: Future's "Turn On The Lights"

History: history? History? HISTORY? Don't be absurd. For there to be history would imply that the time-space continuum holds the Atlanta rapper Future in its grasp, that he is bound by the same physics that governs rove beetles and plums and mailmen. Future is no mortal. Future is the GODKING. Future is the Earth and the air and the cosmos and everything and nothing. Future is the alpha and the omega. Future is the father of Chaos and the son of Chaos at the same damn time. History? Please. Your face is history. (Also, Future plays at Key Club tonight.)

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Maroon 5's "One More Night"

History: "One More Night" is from Maroon 5's mostly supposed-to-be-saucy-but-mostly-forgettable Overexposed album, which, FYI, does not include naked pictures of Adam Levine in the liner notes so don't buy it if that's what you were thinking. You will be way disappointed when you open it*.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: The Lion King's "Hakuna Matata"

History: "Hakuna Matata" is from Disney's The Lion King. The first time I saw The Lion King was as a preteen with a childhood friend named Bobby. The night before, we spent a few hours hanging out at a convenience store near his apartment complex because his friend, likely at least 25 years older than both us, asked him to come keep him company. When we left, he paid us $10 and gave us a porno magazine. I'm only right now at this very second realizing how close I was to being molested in the back of a Stop n' Go.

Atmospherics: Relaxed and carefree x 1000; like the sneakiest scoundrel of all.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Pink's "Blow Me (One Last Kiss)"

History: "Blow Me" is the first single from Pink's latest album, The Truth About Love. Or, I guess it is. I'm not 100 percent sure. The songs have all been the same shit for, like, the last ten years. We get it, Pink. You're feisty. Chill, bro.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Lil Wayne's "No Worries"

See also: Top 60 Worst Lil Wayne Lines on Tha Carter IV

History: "No Worries" is the ominous single from Lil Wayne's forthcoming I Am Not A Human Being II. When I was in the ninth grade I thought it'd be a good idea to take a bike that belonged to my neighbor (he was in the fourth grade) and use it to jump this big dirt hill that was in the yard a few houses up from us. I pedaled to the top of our street, turned around, came flying down, rode straight at the hill, hit it, ascended towards the stratosphere like a goddamn superstar, then completely panicked when the teeny-tiny bike began to tilt too far forwards.

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[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.]

Song: Chris Brown's "Don't Wake Me Up"

History: "Don't Wake Me Up" is the hyper danceclub track from Chris Brown's latest album, Fortune. Apparently, wherever it is that Chris Brown was raised, kids are taught that the word "fortune" is a synonym for "poopfest," because that's absolutely what that album is.

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